This is the begining

This Blog is a journey of my total surrender to G-d. I make a promise to myself, that this one place where it is safe to be me.

To aid me in this journey I will be using my NKJV Bible, the One Year Bible NLT, The One Year Book of Daily Prayer, and several different books as G-d leads. The current one is What Happens When Women say Yes to G-d by Lysa Terkeurst.

I picked this book up on Wednesday. Patience and I went in Family Christian to look for Books on dream interpretation, and I ended up with this. I came home and read the first two pages I think, got to the word surrender, started bawling and had to stop. Thursday was just a glimpse so here it is Friday and I am digging in again.

Ok Father, here I am please open my eyes to see and my ears to hear You speak to me. Father please loose the Holy Spirit in me to teach and bind the enemy from distracting. Help me Father to make the leap straight into your arms. I ask this in Jesus name Amen.

Page 13 " You simply have to surrender all that's clamoring for attention in your heart with the answer that God is longing to hear spill from your lips, "Yes, G-d"" I am not there yet, I am still asking what will happen when I do will I loose all control? I come to the edge and I stand and look at the far side where Jesus is with His arms out stretched and I even take a step off the side in to the gulf that seperates us, but then I pull back and step back from the edge back into my comfort zone.

Page 14 she talks about women who experience G-d in everything because they have choosen to surrender, I am jealous of that, and I want that, but I am so afraid? No not afraid, how about stiff necked, stubborn, and want my way.

Page 14 "A woman that says yes to G-d is not afraid to be honest with Him"

Page 16 "Being a woman that say yes to G-d means making the choice to trust Him even when you don't understand why He requires some of the things He does" "It also means that once you say yes to G-d, you refuse to turn back, even when things get hard."

My eyes are so tired I can hardly hold them open. I will work on this again tomorrow.